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How ‘Keeping Up With The Joneses’ On Social Media Is Detrimental

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I can’t help but fall into the rabbit hole of comparison when surfing social media and the internet. Can you relate? I wonder how the Joneses got so far ahead of us? And where did the saying “keeping up with the Joneses” come from? A little research found me in 1913 looking at a comic strip from Arthur R. “Pop” Momand. The comic strip followed the McGinis family, who struggled to “keep up” with their neighbors, the Joneses. The comic strip ran in various newspapers until approximately 1940.

During this same time, Henry Ford introduced the assembly line, and cigarettes found their new mascot, Joe Camel. Back then, keeping up with the Joneses meant the neighbors that could afford the Model T. In 1959, Barbie was introduced, and the skinny yet, full-figured gal would storm the world, forever changing how the world would perceive “beauty.” Today, social media has taken that further with glamorous pictures and videos of mansions, vacations, and Barbie-like beauty that the masses cannot duplicate.

The pressure is real. There is a competition to see who has been on the most exotic vacation, whose social status is more elite, and who has the most beautiful home on Instagram.

In today’s digital age, it has become almost impossible to escape the constant barrage of carefully curated lives and seemingly perfect lifestyles displayed across social media platforms. As we scroll through our feeds, we are constantly bombarded with images of exotic vacations, luxurious purchases, and picture-perfect moments, leading us to compare our lives and achievements to those of others. But what is the actual cost of this constant comparison?

The Impact of Social Comparison

Social comparison is a natural human tendency, but in the age of social media, it has taken on a whole new dimension. We find ourselves constantly comparing our lives to those of others, often without even realizing it. This constant comparison can profoundly impact our mental and emotional well-being.

Research has shown that comparing ourselves to others leads to low self-esteem, inadequacy, and depression. We question our worth and value based on the seemingly superior lives of those we see on our screens. The constant need to measure up to an unattainable standard can lead to chronic stress and dissatisfaction with our lives.

Financial Consequences of Comparison

The financial consequences of comparison are often overlooked but can be significant. When we see others living seemingly perfect lives, we may feel pressure to maintain appearances and a particular lifestyle. This leads to overspending and accumulating debt to afford what we believe will make us more like those we admire.

The hidden cost of constantly comparing ourselves to others can result in financial strain as we try to live beyond our means to keep up with an idealized image. The pressure to maintain a particular appearance can lead to poor financial decisions, such as investing in expensive possessions or experiences that do not align with our true values and priorities.

Emotional Consequences of Comparison

The emotional toll of constant comparison can be devastating. When we constantly measure ourselves against others, we set ourselves up for feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt. We begin to question our accomplishments and talents, feeling we fall short compared to others. Comparison leads to a continual need for validation and approval from others as we seek to prove our worth. The emotional consequences can also extend to our relationships, as envy and resentment can arise when we feel that others have more than us. This can strain friendships and cause unnecessary tension in our lives.

Photo by Georgia de Lotz on Unsplash

The Link Between Comparison and Consumerism

Comparison and consumerism often go hand in hand. When we constantly compare ourselves to others, we are more likely to engage in materialistic behaviors to keep up. We may feel that acquiring particular possessions or experiences will make us more like those we admire, leading to a never-ending consumption cycle. This constant pursuit of material possessions can be financially draining as we accumulate debt and struggle to maintain a particular lifestyle. It can also be emotionally unsatisfying as we realize that material possessions do not bring us happiness.  


Remember, the only person we should be comparing ourselves to is the person we were yesterday.


Strategies to Overcome Comparison

Overcoming the habit of constant comparison takes work, but it is possible. Here are some strategies to help break free from the comparison trap:

1. Practice self-awareness: Start by recognizing the thoughts and emotions that arise when you compare yourself to others. 

2. Cultivate gratitude: Shift your focus from what you lack to what you already have. Practice gratitude daily by acknowledging the blessings in your life. This can help counteract the envy and dissatisfaction that comparison often brings.

3. Set realistic goals: Instead of comparing yourself to others, set meaningful and achievable goals. Focus on your progress and growth rather than measuring yourself against someone else’s standards.

4. Limit social media use: Take breaks from social media or set boundaries around your usage. Constant exposure to carefully curated lives can fuel comparison and negatively impact self-esteem. Instead, use social media as a tool for connection and inspiration rather than a source of comparison.

5. Practice self-compassion: Embrace imperfections and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may seem compared to others; everyone has their own unique journey.


Building a Healthier Relationship with Social Media

While social media can be a breeding ground for comparison, it can also be a source of connection and inspiration. Here are some ideas for building a healthier relationship with social media:

1. Curate your feed: Be intentional about who you follow and what content you consume. Surround yourself with accounts that inspire and uplift you rather than those that trigger feelings of comparison and inadequacy.

2. Engage authentically: Use social media as a platform for genuine connection. Engage with others meaningfully rather than getting caught up in the numbers game. Focus on building relationships rather than accumulating likes and followers.

3. Take breaks: Give yourself regular breaks from social media to recharge and reconnect with the present moment. Use this time to engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.

4. Seek out positive communities: Join online communities that align with your interests and values. Surround yourself with like-minded individuals that provide support and encouragement.


The Role of Gratitude in Combatting Comparison

The constant comparison that has become a hallmark of our digital age comes at a cost. The emotional and financial consequences can be significant, leading to debt, dissatisfaction, and strained relationships. However, by recognizing the negative impact of comparison and then finding strategies to overcome it, we can find contentment and fulfillment in our unique journey.

Gratitude is a powerful tool in combatting comparison. We cultivate a sense of contentment and fulfillment when we shift our focus from what we lack to what we already have. Practicing gratitude can help us appreciate the unique qualities and experiences that make our lives meaningful. By acknowledging and embracing the blessings in our lives, we can break free from the constant need to compare ourselves to others.

Embracing authenticity, cultivating gratitude, and seeking support are vital steps towards breaking free from the comparison trap and creating a life that is true to ourselves. Remember, the only person we should be comparing ourselves to is the person we were yesterday.



Featured Photo by Vladimir Fedotov on Unsplash


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August 8, 2023

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